As the weeks—and more likely—days pass by, I find myself most worried about the longstanding effects I will have on my baby girl. Not about making sure she is fed, bathed, diapered and safe, but how will my words and actions affect her as she grows up.
I can probably mostly blame my extreme sensitivity on this … I mean I can remember things that those who love me most said to me when I was very young that really hurt (and I don’t mean hateful comments or anything … just words spoken out of frustration). How do I protect her from that same hurt? How will I be able to ensure that she knows how much I love her when life gets the best of me; when I lose my temper because of dumb things; when life just seems overwhelming?
Like in Juno, where her dad tells her he thought she was smarter than that … his disapproval really hurt her and she was a teenager… and fictional at that.
She’s not even here yet and I find myself already thinking about how I need to make better financial decisions so I can give her the best of everything—very materialistic, I know … but do children really grasp why their friends have better things than them? I just want her to be happy at any cost.
I guess I just have to love her unconditionally and demonstrate the true value of love. And when I make one mistake, I have to brush it aside and try better. I just want to be a good mom—no; the best mom. And of course, I want Denny to be the best dad, but I’m not as worried about him … he’s pretty great at loving people unconditionally … I mean, he married me, right?
Friday, July 31, 2009
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Michigan shower
This past weekend was wonderful ... and exhausting! My mom came in on Thursday and we had a great night. We watched Jenny play softball, went out to eat and even played Mario Cart on the Wii.
On Friday, Mom and I ran some errands in the morning and got back in time for the TV repair guy to come. We started cleaning ... when I say "we," I really mean Mom. She was great ... cleaning the bathrooms and everything. Then Jeremy came over and helped me get the basement in order. I was astonished by how much we accomplished!
Saturday was my Michigan shower and it was wonderful! So many people came and truly spoiled us with presents. It was so amazing to see all my friends and Denny's family. Debbie and Alicia did such a great job and I am so thankful to them.
After the shower, Mom, Jenny and I headed to Marshall to eat dinner with Jeremy and listen to a little music in the downtown area. Mom left pretty early on Sunday and Denny and I just took it easy all day - that was the first time in weeks that we have done that and it was glorious!
Monday, July 13, 2009
Exhausted
Moving into a new home late in pregnancy really is crazy … and not just for me … Denny has had to work overtime to accomplish things I can’t help with … like painting everything! He has done an amazing job and is almost done … I lost count of how many cans of paint we purchased, but I think it was around 15 … seriously, it may have been more! Anyway, we are getting closer to returning to normalcy … one downer … the bulb in our TV went out on Saturday morning.
Literally the day after DISH came to install HD for us … we have to wait until Friday to get it back up and running. So no All-Star game viewing in HD … at least it’s covered by our warranty!
My mom is coming on Thursday and I can’t wait! I want to get a lot accomplished before she comes, but she is practically begging me to let her help clean, so I will probably take her up on it!
We have to make a big push to have the house presentable by Saturday because Debbie and Alicia are throwing me a baby shower and we really want everyone to be able to see the new place. I really don’t know how we will accomplish this, but we’ll do the best we can.
Literally the day after DISH came to install HD for us … we have to wait until Friday to get it back up and running. So no All-Star game viewing in HD … at least it’s covered by our warranty!
My mom is coming on Thursday and I can’t wait! I want to get a lot accomplished before she comes, but she is practically begging me to let her help clean, so I will probably take her up on it!
We have to make a big push to have the house presentable by Saturday because Debbie and Alicia are throwing me a baby shower and we really want everyone to be able to see the new place. I really don’t know how we will accomplish this, but we’ll do the best we can.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Indiana weekend

On Saturday we mostly just hung out … watched Bobby play in the pool, played hillbilly golf, went to church, out to eat and then came home and played with water balloons. It was one of the best days I can remember in some time! Just a fun time with the entire family!
Early on Sunday morning, I woke up because my back was killing me. Mom, Jeremy, Jenny and Riley were all awake and hanging out in the living room. Jeremy eventually fell asleep, Jenny went to take a shower, I was dozing off on the couch and my mom had gotten sweet little Riley to fall back asleep. She asked me to take her so she could get back to work in the kitchen. Riley and I slept on the couch for quite a while … it was so sweet! And while she was laying on me, Baby Tison started kicking like never before … it was so amazing! Then when Joe, Kelly and Bobby got up, Bobby wanted to sit by me, too. So sweet … I love those kids!!

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