I will not feel guilty for doing what's right

I have to keep telling myself this. Today, I failed to consider the reprecussions when I sought out some advice. Even though I truly believe I did the right thing (legally, I know I did), I put someone in an awkward position - in a sense, called someone out.

I thought life was returning to more of a normal, but now I feel horrible. If anyone knows of any good jobs out there, please let me know. I think I might need a new one soon. :(

I need to remind myself that taking the easy road is simple; it's the high road that often becomes too steep for people. Even though I feel uncomfortable because I know I forever altered an important working relationship, I did the right thing - I can't always say that, which is why I think it is difficult to grasp. I certainly wish I would have handled the situation differently, but I must move on. I have too much joy to waste another day or hour or minute.

My moment of panic

Last week was difficult. By the time Saturday rolled around, I was so relieved. I had survived a very busy work week and completed a big group project in my online class. I was looking forward to taking the kids to a birthday for our friends' son, Lennon.

We went and had a fun time. On the way home, I stopped by a grocery store to pick up a few things. After we checked out and went the car, I first loaded in Colt then the groceries then my purse and keys. Emma tried to climb into the driver's seat and I got her out of there so we could walk around and buckle her in. As I closed the driver's side door, I heard the click. I locked the keys in the car ... along with my baby ... and my phone ... and wallet.

I must have looked very pacicked. The nice young couple who had been in line behind us at the checkout had parked nearby. She saw me as she was getting into her car, and she asked me if everything was okay. I told her no with tears in my eyes. She handed me her phone and I dialed one of very few numbers I know by heart (stupid reliance on cell phones). I knew Denny wouldn't answer a call from a strange number ... I just didn't know what else to do.

My hero kind samaritan then looked up a towing company. I called and told them my plight and we waited. Much to my relief, Colt was sound asleep. The tow truck arrived pretty quickly and we were rescued. That was definitely $40 we could have gone without spending, but I was so relieved at the kindess of others. The tow company really hustled knowing I was a worried mom.

Sometimes even crummy moments like that are healthy reminders that everything is going to okay. Life will never go the way we want it to at every moment, but it is important to maintain perspective and roll with the hits - big and small - for as long as we can.

On the mend

So, I challenged myself to write three or four times a week and then I went missing! Want to know what happened? I had a rough week ... not just me, though. Colt Buddy got a cold ... and as it got worse, he stopped sleeping. He tried to sleep, but this sweet, sad little whimper persisted to come out from him. So, I didn't sleep either. And after one night of that, I made sure Denny didn't sleep either. In hindsight, I should have just let Denny sleep. It would have saved some tension. I hope I remember that for next time.

To top it off, I had a big group project due in my class, and we have several big deadlines looming at work. Last week was just very stressful, and the fact that I survived it was just short of a miracle.

For the record, Colt had an ear infection. They discovered it three days after his initial trip to his doctor's office. The doctor who diagnosed him told me that sleep problems are often a better indicator of an ear infection than little tykes pulling on their ears. Good to know!

Colt is on the mend and I am, too. I had some good cries; said many prayers and my happy little world is back in order. I hope I am able to cope better with the next challenging week.

I promise to write better posts soon!

100 posts and a new challenge

I was a little surprised to see that I only recently reached post number 100. This blog has existed for quite some time, so that's a little embarrassing. Unfortunately, I can’t go back in time and document more, but I can control the future! Well, my future, anyway.

My goal for the next year is to write 100 posts … that shouldn’t be too hard. I just need to post every three or four days. I look forward to documenting more of my children’s lives. I can’t believe how fast they are both growing, and I don’t want to forget any of it!

So that is my goal. I will check back on Nov. 2, 2013, to see if I actually accomplished it. I think I will.  

Halloween 2012

For Halloween, Emma wanted to be a witch - a mean witch! It was fun to let her pick what she wanted to be this year. Colt was a little monster. It was a costume I had picked up over the summer at a garage sale, so it worked out great!

We went trick-or-treating in Addison for a little while. It was so cold, but I bundled Colt in a blanket, and Emma wore her dressy purple coat, which matched her costume. We then headed to Debbie's and then on to Dennis' to finish the evening.

It was a fun day!

Gloomy day, gloomy mood

I haven’t blogged in so long because life, overall, is great and busy. I have so many things I am thankful for, I really do, but today I just feel gloomy.

It’s always hard to take a long road trip—both physically and mentally—but this one was the worst … hopefully of all time. By no means does that mean I will never go on another one, but I certainly need some time to recover.

As I reflect on the two moments that made me feel slightly betrayed and completely protective, I am floored. I hope I never hurt someone I love in that way. Words really do cut deep, and I know I am an overly emotional person, but even the toughest skin would not have withstood those blows. OK, maybe I am being a little dramatic, but I am just gloomy.

I wish I could be with my babies at their Halloween party today instead of at work. I hate the fact that Denny and I continue to work hard, and I am still constantly stressed out about money. I know it will pass … we are working so hard to make this time pass, but it is hard.

I think that’s all. Now that I look at it, it doesn’t seem so bad. But, the pit is still there.

This, too, shall pass.

Jenny's wedding

After many long anticipated and fun months of planning, Jenny and Aaron got married on June 2, 2012. It was a windy day (a lot like my own, actually). It was so wonderful to see my beautiful sister and best friend exchange vows with her soul mate. Jenny and Aaron really are perfect, and their day was pretty perfect, too.

The ceremony was so windy that Jenny's veil (which was very well fastened into her hair) kept whipping all around her face. Some memorable pictures were taken thanks to it. After the ceremony and pictures, we ate. I cried like a baby, but made it through my speech. I had to go from memory because I left my notes at home, but it turned out okay. I hope I was able to articulate how special she is to me.

Afterward, we danced until the wee hours and then went home and crashed. It was so special to see some special people for the weekend. Joe, Kelly and the kids of course came up, but so did two of Jenny's good friends from Baton Rouge. They were so sweet picking up flowers and doing some of the smaller, detail work. It was just a perfect wedding and a perfect start to a great life for Mr. and Mrs. Seagraves.